Health & Fitness

March 2008
Let’s Talk about Sex
BN’s very own Health & Fitness Editor gives you the facts on sex health and fitness
By Jasmin Guleria
With all the books, web sites, and darling talk show hosts giving us tips on how to keep it hot, tasty, fresh, and healthy in the bedroom, it’s a fair assumption that some of us might be overwhelmed! Here are some simple must-do’s that only a fitness-savvy foodie fashionista could appreciate.

Fuel Up Dear Foodies:
nterestingly enough, the foods that are bad for your regular diet are bad for your sexual appetite as well! Avoid excessive sugar, salt, saturated fat, coffee, tobacco, and highly processed foods. This junk is linked to frigidity, difficulty reaching an orgasm and even, horrors of horrors, a lack of interest in sex!

To keep you at your peak sexual performance, ditch the burger at lunch and opt for a salad filled with grilled Alaskan Salmon, tomatoes, avocados, zucchini, and cauliflower. End your meal with a tangy-sweet orange. The veggies will keep your blood sugar level stable and thus happy and healthy for sex, while a citrus fruit such as the orange will do wonders for your sexual appetite! Also, salmon is a huge factor for sex because it is full of Essential Fatty Acids, which are crucial for the production of female sex hormones. You can also get your EFA’s from flaxseeds, fish oils, and primrose.

Aside from their inner sexual appetite, women are often curious about what to eat to make them taste and smell better in the nether regions. According to popular belief, the sweet and sugary pineapple is the #1 fruit that will keep your significant other eager to head south. But don’t take our word on it ladies, on your next date-night skip the after-dinner chocolate soufflé, pick up a bowl of this tropical delight, and see where the night takes you. Now that’s one dessert I could get used to!

Finally, just like our everyday health, taking vitamins is crucial for optimal sex health and enjoyment. 30 minutes before sex, pop in Vitamins E and B to help you get to the ever-coveted Big O.

Fitness-Mavens Rejoice:
Just like any other body part, your pelvic muscles need conditioning and strengthening exercises as well. Kegel Exercises will not only intensify and increase the number of your orgasms, but they also help get your PC muscles (the muscles around your pelvic bone) ready for birthing and help the uber painful process pass a bit more easily.

To find your PC muscles just remember the last time you had to wait to pee and clenched to hold it in. Those clenched muscles are your PC muscles, and clenching them is a kegel! Easy enough, no? Start off slow by seeing how many Kegels you can do before your muscles start to feel tired. Just like any other muscle, keep working on your endurance by increasing reps and sets. Experts say that if you can work up to 3 sets of 30 strong squeezes four times a week, you’re golden.

Health & Fitness

March 2008
Let’s Talk about Sex
BN’s very own Health & Fitness Editor gives you the facts on sex health and fitness
By Jasmin Guleria
With all the books, web sites, and darling talk show hosts giving us tips on how to keep it hot, tasty, fresh, and healthy in the bedroom, it’s a fair assumption that some of us might be overwhelmed! Here are some simple must-do’s that only a fitness-savvy foodie fashionista could appreciate.

Fuel Up Dear Foodies:
nterestingly enough, the foods that are bad for your regular diet are bad for your sexual appetite as well! Avoid excessive sugar, salt, saturated fat, coffee, tobacco, and highly processed foods. This junk is linked to frigidity, difficulty reaching an orgasm and even, horrors of horrors, a lack of interest in sex!

To keep you at your peak sexual performance, ditch the burger at lunch and opt for a salad filled with grilled Alaskan Salmon, tomatoes, avocados, zucchini, and cauliflower. End your meal with a tangy-sweet orange. The veggies will keep your blood sugar level stable and thus happy and healthy for sex, while a citrus fruit such as the orange will do wonders for your sexual appetite! Also, salmon is a huge factor for sex because it is full of Essential Fatty Acids, which are crucial for the production of female sex hormones. You can also get your EFA’s from flaxseeds, fish oils, and primrose.

Aside from their inner sexual appetite, women are often curious about what to eat to make them taste and smell better in the nether regions. According to popular belief, the sweet and sugary pineapple is the #1 fruit that will keep your significant other eager to head south. But don’t take our word on it ladies, on your next date-night skip the after-dinner chocolate soufflé, pick up a bowl of this tropical delight, and see where the night takes you. Now that’s one dessert I could get used to!

Finally, just like our everyday health, taking vitamins is crucial for optimal sex health and enjoyment. 30 minutes before sex, pop in Vitamins E and B to help you get to the ever-coveted Big O.

Fitness-Mavens Rejoice:
Just like any other body part, your pelvic muscles need conditioning and strengthening exercises as well. Kegel Exercises will not only intensify and increase the number of your orgasms, but they also help get your PC muscles (the muscles around your pelvic bone) ready for birthing and help the uber painful process pass a bit more easily.

To find your PC muscles just remember the last time you had to wait to pee and clenched to hold it in. Those clenched muscles are your PC muscles, and clenching them is a kegel! Easy enough, no? Start off slow by seeing how many Kegels you can do before your muscles start to feel tired. Just like any other muscle, keep working on your endurance by increasing reps and sets. Experts say that if you can work up to 3 sets of 30 strong squeezes four times a week, you’re golden.

Sexuality, Sex and health

Great sex, it's no secret
It's all about changing our ideas about sexuality and starting to feel empowered.
BY Donna Duggan | Jun 04, 2008
Sexuality is simply the way you experience and express yourself as a sexual being.

According to Jacqueline Hellyer, for centuries many women have been struggling with their sexuality: “We’ve had the Madonna/whore mentality for so long – where you should be one or the other – that it’s really left women feeling confused.”

To get a better understanding of Hellyer’s work, I attend her “Luscious Woman” full-day, women-only workshop. The event offers the opportunity to “unleash the awesome power of your female sexuality”, which sounds new age and confronting, but I’m willing to keep an open mind.

At 8.30am I line up for registration with the other women who have chosen to part with $400 for the workshop. I’m surprised by how gorgeous they are. Surely they have nothing to unleash?

The 14 women range in age from mid-20s to mid-50s.

“Helping people get in touch with their sexuality and seeing it in a really positive way is my main focus,” Hellyer says, as she eases us into the day. “Many of the sexual problems that women in modern society have stem from the fact that we have a very narrow view of what sex is all about, and it’s not a particularly good view.

“Sex is an intrinsic part of our being. It’s as natural as eating food. However, society tries to compartmentalise the experience, to judge it as good or bad. It’s left a lot of people confused. No one really knows what they should or shouldn’t be doing.

Additionally, there’s not a lot of good information out there about how to optimise your sexual experience. My goal is to give people that information so they can experience sex as something that is life-enhancing and very, very enjoyable.”

Our first topic is a history lesson. “Prior to the patrilineal civilisation we live in today,” Hellyer says, “women were more empowered and free in how they expressed themselves sexually. When man set out to conquer the world and establish a more male-dominated religion, things changed. It’s now up to us to swing the pendulum back a bit and reclaim that sense of empowerment we once felt about our bodies and our sexuality.”

Next, we move on to biology, real biology. We see diagrams of how female arousal mechanically works and how large the clitoris actually is. Through illustrations we see that penis size really doesn’t matter; it’s how a man uses it.

WHAT’S “NORMAL”?

“The challenge for me is the way sex is viewed by society,” Hellyer says. “Because of that view, people may avoid my type of work because they expect it to be about sex toys and Tantric sex techniques. Or they think they couldn’t possibly do something like that because they don’t feel good about sex or because it’s too confronting.”

Sexuality, Sex and health

Great sex, it's no secret
It's all about changing our ideas about sexuality and starting to feel empowered.
BY Donna Duggan | Jun 04, 2008
Sexuality is simply the way you experience and express yourself as a sexual being.

According to Jacqueline Hellyer, for centuries many women have been struggling with their sexuality: “We’ve had the Madonna/whore mentality for so long – where you should be one or the other – that it’s really left women feeling confused.”

To get a better understanding of Hellyer’s work, I attend her “Luscious Woman” full-day, women-only workshop. The event offers the opportunity to “unleash the awesome power of your female sexuality”, which sounds new age and confronting, but I’m willing to keep an open mind.

At 8.30am I line up for registration with the other women who have chosen to part with $400 for the workshop. I’m surprised by how gorgeous they are. Surely they have nothing to unleash?

The 14 women range in age from mid-20s to mid-50s.

“Helping people get in touch with their sexuality and seeing it in a really positive way is my main focus,” Hellyer says, as she eases us into the day. “Many of the sexual problems that women in modern society have stem from the fact that we have a very narrow view of what sex is all about, and it’s not a particularly good view.

“Sex is an intrinsic part of our being. It’s as natural as eating food. However, society tries to compartmentalise the experience, to judge it as good or bad. It’s left a lot of people confused. No one really knows what they should or shouldn’t be doing.

Additionally, there’s not a lot of good information out there about how to optimise your sexual experience. My goal is to give people that information so they can experience sex as something that is life-enhancing and very, very enjoyable.”

Our first topic is a history lesson. “Prior to the patrilineal civilisation we live in today,” Hellyer says, “women were more empowered and free in how they expressed themselves sexually. When man set out to conquer the world and establish a more male-dominated religion, things changed. It’s now up to us to swing the pendulum back a bit and reclaim that sense of empowerment we once felt about our bodies and our sexuality.”

Next, we move on to biology, real biology. We see diagrams of how female arousal mechanically works and how large the clitoris actually is. Through illustrations we see that penis size really doesn’t matter; it’s how a man uses it.

WHAT’S “NORMAL”?

“The challenge for me is the way sex is viewed by society,” Hellyer says. “Because of that view, people may avoid my type of work because they expect it to be about sex toys and Tantric sex techniques. Or they think they couldn’t possibly do something like that because they don’t feel good about sex or because it’s too confronting.”

Sexual Health, for gays

Sexual Health
The information below addresses specific information about STDs/STIs (sexually transmitted diseases, sexually transmitted infections) other than HIV and syphilis that frequently affect gay men in Palm Springs. Some of the links include graphic images of potential symptoms and should be viewed with caution.

If you feel that you or someone you know my have been infected with any of the conditions detailed on this page, click here for testing sites.

Chlamydia
Chlamydia, which is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis, targets the cells of the mucous membranes including the surfaces of the urethra, as well as the anus or rectum. Chlamydia sometimes even affects the mouth or throat.

How it's spread:
Chlamydia is easily transmitted through semen, pre-seminal fluid and vaginal secretions during unprotected anal or oral sex with an infected person. It can also be transmitted by touching an infected area with your own genitals, anus or by sharing sex toys contaminated with infected fluids. Someone with no symptoms can still transmit it. Chlamydia is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.

Symptoms may include:

1. Discharge from the genitals, which may be yellow or white, watery or thick (see picture);
2. Need to urinate (pee) more often;
3. Thick yellow or white drip from the genitals
4. Burning or pain when you urinate (pee) or have a bowel movement;
5. Some may not experience any symptoms.

Treatment for Chlamydia:
A healthcare provider may prescribe a single-dose antibiotic, such as azithromycin (Zithromax), ta ken as a pill. On the other hand, the healthcare provider may choose an antibiotic, such as doxycycline (Atridox, Bio-Tab), to be ta ken as a pill twice a day for a week. Up to 95% of people will be cured after one course of antibiotics.

Prevention
Abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing Chlamydia, however if you choose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of condoms can effectively help reduce the risk of transmission.
Genital Herpes (HSV)
Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV) is a recurrent skin condition characterized by sores on the mouth or genitals. HSV-1 commonly causes “cold sores” or “fever blisters” on the mouth or face. HSV-2 is a closely related virus that is a much more serious infection causing painful sores on the genitals which can also be spread to the mouth or throat.

How it's spread:
HSV is primarily transmitted, both sexually and non-sexually, by direct contact with an active sore: mouth to genitals, genitals to genitals, mouth to anus or genitals to anus. It can also be transmitted when there are no active sores present as small amounts of the virus “sheds” onto the skin surface even when there is no active, visible sore. HSV is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.

Symptoms may include:

1. Small, painful blisters on the sex organs (see picture) or mouth (see picture);
2. Itching or burning before the blisters appear;
3. Blisters generally last 1-3 weeks. When they do go away, HSV is still present in the body. The blisters may reoccur in the same area with varying frequency;
4. An outbreak may be preceded by flu-like feelings.

Treatment for Genital Herpes:
There are medications available to treat genital herpes infections, preventing or reducing the frequency or recurrent outbreaks. However, herpes cannot be "cured." The decision to use one treatment over another for genital herpes depends on many factors that must be discussed with your healthcare provider. During an outbreak, keep the infected area as clean and dry as possible as this will help the natural healing processes. Some healthcare providers recommend warm showers in order to cleanse the infected area. Afterwards, towel dry gently, or dry the area with a hair dryer on a low or cool setting. To prevent chaffing, some people also find it helpful to avoid tight-fitting undergarments. Finally, a healthy immune system is important in controlling outbreaks of the virus. Don't ignore the need for proper nutrition, exercise, and rest.

Prevention
There is no inoculation for herpes so abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing HSV infection. However, if you chose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of latex barriers (condoms) can help reduce the risk of transmission. However, only areas covered by condoms, dams or gloves are protected from infection.

Sexual Health, for gays

Sexual Health
The information below addresses specific information about STDs/STIs (sexually transmitted diseases, sexually transmitted infections) other than HIV and syphilis that frequently affect gay men in Palm Springs. Some of the links include graphic images of potential symptoms and should be viewed with caution.

If you feel that you or someone you know my have been infected with any of the conditions detailed on this page, click here for testing sites.

Chlamydia
Chlamydia, which is caused by the bacteria Chlamydia trachomatis, targets the cells of the mucous membranes including the surfaces of the urethra, as well as the anus or rectum. Chlamydia sometimes even affects the mouth or throat.

How it's spread:
Chlamydia is easily transmitted through semen, pre-seminal fluid and vaginal secretions during unprotected anal or oral sex with an infected person. It can also be transmitted by touching an infected area with your own genitals, anus or by sharing sex toys contaminated with infected fluids. Someone with no symptoms can still transmit it. Chlamydia is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.

Symptoms may include:

1. Discharge from the genitals, which may be yellow or white, watery or thick (see picture);
2. Need to urinate (pee) more often;
3. Thick yellow or white drip from the genitals
4. Burning or pain when you urinate (pee) or have a bowel movement;
5. Some may not experience any symptoms.

Treatment for Chlamydia:
A healthcare provider may prescribe a single-dose antibiotic, such as azithromycin (Zithromax), ta ken as a pill. On the other hand, the healthcare provider may choose an antibiotic, such as doxycycline (Atridox, Bio-Tab), to be ta ken as a pill twice a day for a week. Up to 95% of people will be cured after one course of antibiotics.

Prevention
Abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing Chlamydia, however if you choose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of condoms can effectively help reduce the risk of transmission.
Genital Herpes (HSV)
Herpes Simplex Virus (HSV) is a recurrent skin condition characterized by sores on the mouth or genitals. HSV-1 commonly causes “cold sores” or “fever blisters” on the mouth or face. HSV-2 is a closely related virus that is a much more serious infection causing painful sores on the genitals which can also be spread to the mouth or throat.

How it's spread:
HSV is primarily transmitted, both sexually and non-sexually, by direct contact with an active sore: mouth to genitals, genitals to genitals, mouth to anus or genitals to anus. It can also be transmitted when there are no active sores present as small amounts of the virus “sheds” onto the skin surface even when there is no active, visible sore. HSV is not transmitted through such casual contact as hugging, shaking hands, sharing food, using the same eating utensils, drinking from the same glass, sitting on public toilets, or touching door knobs.

Symptoms may include:

1. Small, painful blisters on the sex organs (see picture) or mouth (see picture);
2. Itching or burning before the blisters appear;
3. Blisters generally last 1-3 weeks. When they do go away, HSV is still present in the body. The blisters may reoccur in the same area with varying frequency;
4. An outbreak may be preceded by flu-like feelings.

Treatment for Genital Herpes:
There are medications available to treat genital herpes infections, preventing or reducing the frequency or recurrent outbreaks. However, herpes cannot be "cured." The decision to use one treatment over another for genital herpes depends on many factors that must be discussed with your healthcare provider. During an outbreak, keep the infected area as clean and dry as possible as this will help the natural healing processes. Some healthcare providers recommend warm showers in order to cleanse the infected area. Afterwards, towel dry gently, or dry the area with a hair dryer on a low or cool setting. To prevent chaffing, some people also find it helpful to avoid tight-fitting undergarments. Finally, a healthy immune system is important in controlling outbreaks of the virus. Don't ignore the need for proper nutrition, exercise, and rest.

Prevention
There is no inoculation for herpes so abstinence is the only 100% effective way of preventing HSV infection. However, if you chose to engage in sexual activities and are unsure if you or your partner is possibly infected, consistent and correct use of latex barriers (condoms) can help reduce the risk of transmission. However, only areas covered by condoms, dams or gloves are protected from infection.

Archived Articles, sex and health

It's the end of the year and it's the party season.. but how do you go out and have fun with your friends and still be safe? What dangers are there? Is there really anything to worry about?The end of the year can be a great time to relax and have some fun, get together with friends and all those leavers parties can be great- but what if not all goes to plan..

Stress
STRESS



"Not only do I have to worry about friends, family, school, relationships, should I- shouldn't I etc, etc, but to make things worse I don't know why I'm feeling so bad - I just can't cope with it all- I'm just.. just... STRESSIN' "

Stress can really change the way we think and the way we are feeling. There can be lots of reasons;

Sometimes its just because of changes in our body. Sometimes its a particular person or situation. Sometimes its lots of things- but rest assured you are normal. Everyone suffers stress from time to time.

A little stress can be a good thing because it helps us move forward in life - but if we have too much of it or in the wrong ways, then we feel like the wheels are falling off.

"So what can I do about it?"

Try not to make big decisions - making big decisions about relationships and other situations that profoundly affect our lives when we're under stress is rarely a good idea. We're not thinking straight and so are less likely to make the RIGHT decision.

Sort it out- Relationship problems are one of the biggest causes of stress and they rarely go away on their own. Deal

Do what you enjoy - we need time to ourselves regularly doing those things we love to help maintain a healthy chemical balance in the brain to help us deal with stressful situations.

Balance your life as much as you can - exercise, play, sleep, study, work, spend time with family and eat well. Often we get stressed because we are not spending enough time in one or more of these areas on top of life's little ups and downs.

Get some more exercise - Exercise increases the levels of our 'feel good' levels in the brain to give us a more positive outlook and in turn help us deal with stress

Talk about it - Friends are a great resource that can help when we need them. Open up and talk about it, its amazing how much talking can help. If not, talk to a counsellor, parent, youth worker or your GP. Someone a little removed from the situation.
"... I don't want to wake up pregnant. Or even worse with some disease- but is it really that likely to happen?"
"None of the guys I'm likely to sleep with, if I do, would have anything..would they?"
"Just a couple of drinks won't hurt"
"..They're only cordial with a bit of alcohol in them, nothing very strong.. all my friends will be drinking"
.... Sound familiar? These girls thought exactly the same thing...



Emily, 17: "I was at a party and there was this guy who kept going on an on about how he wanted to sleep with me. But he didn't have any condoms and neither did I, so I just told him it wasn't going to happen. Then I kept drinking and the next thing I know I wake up with him on top of me having a good time and I thought: You Prick!"

Alcohol and drugs are half the fun of going to a party. But it's important to know when you switch from "having fun" to "being out of it".

If you're too stoned or drunk to know what you are doing, you are putting yourself at risk...of having unsafe sex; of having sex when you didn't really want it or having sex when you definitely didn't want it, which is rape.

You could wake up with more than a hangover. You could wake up pregnant, with a sexually transmitted infection or just feeling rotten about yourself. It's not worth it.

* Do not stick with anyone if they're making you feel uncomfortable to pressuring you
* Say no at any time if you want to
* If you think you might end up having sex, take a condom
* Plan how you're going to get home. Don't just get into any car when it's time to leave. summer safe

*these suggestions come from an education kit called "Rethinking Drinking"



'Vodka nearly killed me'

After drinking a litre of vodka with her friends to celebrate the end of term, Anna started slipping into a coma.

It was nearly the end of term and, to celebrate, one of Anna's friends suggested they try to get drunk. "One of the boys looks older and he went to buy us alcohol", says Anna, 15. "I asked for an alcopop, but he brought back a litre bottle of vodka.

"I hated the taste, but I decided I'd drink the whole bottle - and that's exactly what I did. The others shared fizzy wine. I remember being sick, but I don't remember much more."

Around 10.30pm, Anna was found slumped outside the youth club. For 10 minutes, friends struggled to get her to open her eyes, without success.

An ambulance was called. The crew tried to rouse her and failed. It was 11.15pm. Her heart rate was dangerously low.

As Anna was rushed to East Surrey Hospital in Redhill, her mother Joanna received the terrible news: her daughter was unconscious. "I just froze," she says. "When I reached A&E, Anna was on a trolley with drips in her nose and a drain down her throat.

Call 000 if someone:

* Passes out and you can't wake them up
* Starts breathing slowly
* Turns blue, clammy or feels cold to the touch
* Starts choking on vomit

"The doctors opened her eyes and shone a torch into them, and her eyes had rolled right back. They asked me whether she took drugs, but I said 'no'," says Anna. "Funnily enough, I'd never worried about alcohol. She didn't even like the taste.

"The doctors managed to bring her round in A&E and they were pumping fluids into her. She had serious dehydration, but they got her to respond."

But at 3am, the monitors connected to Anna went crazy. Her heart rate had plummeted. Anna was going into a coma, so they started injecting her with drugs to revive her. She seemed to be slipping away.

"For nearly an hour, medical staff tried different drugs," says Joanna. "Luckily she stabilised again and the alarms went quiet. Her colour improved and she started breathing more deeply.

"Then at 5am, Anna suddenly sat up and said, 'Where am I? I need the loo!' She's vowed not to get drunk again. She's learnt her lesson."

"I can't even stand the smell of alcohol now," says Anna.
title

Relationships can be hard, and often things don't work out quite as we think they should. We blame ourselves, get sad and start to wonder if we can do anything right. But sometimes we get confused, because people are different, expect different things and we don't know who's right.

So here are a few things to ponder.....

A healthy relationship is based on respect.

It's when:

* you have fun together
* you both feel like you can be yourself
* you can have different opinions and interests
* you listen to each other
* you trust each other
* you can both compromise, say sorry, and talk arguments out
* you don't have to spend all of you spare time together - you can spend time on your own, or with your own friends and family.

"I really love and trust my boyfriend, he's like one of my best friends and I can tell him anything. He just wants us to have fun together, there's no pressure, and he doesn't make a big deal of it if I don't want to do what he wants. I can be myself with him" - Ana.
Jealousy - is this love?

"I thought our relationship was fantastic at first. But now things have started happening that I don't understand. He gets mad a me for wanting to be with my friends. And any time he sees me speaking to any other guy he accuses me of flirting. He says it's because he loves me."

Jealousy might seem like a sign of love. But when someone uses anger or jealousy to try to control what you do, or acts like they 'own' you, this isn't love - it's control. You've got every right to talk to anyone you want to.

What about Sex, am I ready? ..Should I feel Ready?

Having a good relationship doesn't mean you have to have sex. But whatever you do, whether it's kissing, touching or having sex, it should always be something that you both want to do.



Sex is meant to be:

* something you decide to do when you're ready to
* something that makes you both feel good
* something you can interrupt or stop at any time
* safe (because you're both prepared with condoms to protect you from sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancy)

Sex isn't meant to be:

* the only way to prove that you love someone
* something you feel pressured or forced into
* something you do because 'everyone else is doing it'
* something that makes you feel used.

Remember, if you've been kissing or touching but don't want to go any further, that's ok. Kissing is not a contract.
Trust and communication

The most important thing in a sexual relationship is that you trust the other person and you feel like you can communicate with them.

If you are considering a sexual relationship, or if you are in a sexual relationship, ask yourself:

* How much do I trust this person to respect what I do and don't want to do?
* How comfortable would I feel talking with them about safe sex and contraception?
* How comfortable would I feel saying no to them?

Someone who loves you should respect your right to decide if and when to have sex.

If you don't feel ready to have sex, you could say "I really like you but I don't feel ready to have sex yet".
Sex and Pressure

"I kept on pushing his hands away but he just put them back there, then I just froze, I couldn't say anything, it was horrible".

What if someone has touched you or made you touch them in a sexual way, and you felt like you had no choice?

You might have

* felt scared to say no
* felt pressured into having sex, because they made you think that if you didn't, they'd break up with you, or they wouldn't like you
* been asleep or drunk and didn't really know what was going on
* been forced into sexual contact

No-one should force you into any type of sexual contact. In fact, this is sexual assault, and it is a crime that can be reported to the police.

Remember, they have done the wrong thing, not you. It can help to talk to someone about it.

Archived Articles, sex and health

It's the end of the year and it's the party season.. but how do you go out and have fun with your friends and still be safe? What dangers are there? Is there really anything to worry about?The end of the year can be a great time to relax and have some fun, get together with friends and all those leavers parties can be great- but what if not all goes to plan..

Stress
STRESS



"Not only do I have to worry about friends, family, school, relationships, should I- shouldn't I etc, etc, but to make things worse I don't know why I'm feeling so bad - I just can't cope with it all- I'm just.. just... STRESSIN' "

Stress can really change the way we think and the way we are feeling. There can be lots of reasons;

Sometimes its just because of changes in our body. Sometimes its a particular person or situation. Sometimes its lots of things- but rest assured you are normal. Everyone suffers stress from time to time.

A little stress can be a good thing because it helps us move forward in life - but if we have too much of it or in the wrong ways, then we feel like the wheels are falling off.

"So what can I do about it?"

Try not to make big decisions - making big decisions about relationships and other situations that profoundly affect our lives when we're under stress is rarely a good idea. We're not thinking straight and so are less likely to make the RIGHT decision.

Sort it out- Relationship problems are one of the biggest causes of stress and they rarely go away on their own. Deal

Do what you enjoy - we need time to ourselves regularly doing those things we love to help maintain a healthy chemical balance in the brain to help us deal with stressful situations.

Balance your life as much as you can - exercise, play, sleep, study, work, spend time with family and eat well. Often we get stressed because we are not spending enough time in one or more of these areas on top of life's little ups and downs.

Get some more exercise - Exercise increases the levels of our 'feel good' levels in the brain to give us a more positive outlook and in turn help us deal with stress

Talk about it - Friends are a great resource that can help when we need them. Open up and talk about it, its amazing how much talking can help. If not, talk to a counsellor, parent, youth worker or your GP. Someone a little removed from the situation.
"... I don't want to wake up pregnant. Or even worse with some disease- but is it really that likely to happen?"
"None of the guys I'm likely to sleep with, if I do, would have anything..would they?"
"Just a couple of drinks won't hurt"
"..They're only cordial with a bit of alcohol in them, nothing very strong.. all my friends will be drinking"
.... Sound familiar? These girls thought exactly the same thing...



Emily, 17: "I was at a party and there was this guy who kept going on an on about how he wanted to sleep with me. But he didn't have any condoms and neither did I, so I just told him it wasn't going to happen. Then I kept drinking and the next thing I know I wake up with him on top of me having a good time and I thought: You Prick!"

Alcohol and drugs are half the fun of going to a party. But it's important to know when you switch from "having fun" to "being out of it".

If you're too stoned or drunk to know what you are doing, you are putting yourself at risk...of having unsafe sex; of having sex when you didn't really want it or having sex when you definitely didn't want it, which is rape.

You could wake up with more than a hangover. You could wake up pregnant, with a sexually transmitted infection or just feeling rotten about yourself. It's not worth it.

* Do not stick with anyone if they're making you feel uncomfortable to pressuring you
* Say no at any time if you want to
* If you think you might end up having sex, take a condom
* Plan how you're going to get home. Don't just get into any car when it's time to leave. summer safe

*these suggestions come from an education kit called "Rethinking Drinking"



'Vodka nearly killed me'

After drinking a litre of vodka with her friends to celebrate the end of term, Anna started slipping into a coma.

It was nearly the end of term and, to celebrate, one of Anna's friends suggested they try to get drunk. "One of the boys looks older and he went to buy us alcohol", says Anna, 15. "I asked for an alcopop, but he brought back a litre bottle of vodka.

"I hated the taste, but I decided I'd drink the whole bottle - and that's exactly what I did. The others shared fizzy wine. I remember being sick, but I don't remember much more."

Around 10.30pm, Anna was found slumped outside the youth club. For 10 minutes, friends struggled to get her to open her eyes, without success.

An ambulance was called. The crew tried to rouse her and failed. It was 11.15pm. Her heart rate was dangerously low.

As Anna was rushed to East Surrey Hospital in Redhill, her mother Joanna received the terrible news: her daughter was unconscious. "I just froze," she says. "When I reached A&E, Anna was on a trolley with drips in her nose and a drain down her throat.

Call 000 if someone:

* Passes out and you can't wake them up
* Starts breathing slowly
* Turns blue, clammy or feels cold to the touch
* Starts choking on vomit

"The doctors opened her eyes and shone a torch into them, and her eyes had rolled right back. They asked me whether she took drugs, but I said 'no'," says Anna. "Funnily enough, I'd never worried about alcohol. She didn't even like the taste.

"The doctors managed to bring her round in A&E and they were pumping fluids into her. She had serious dehydration, but they got her to respond."

But at 3am, the monitors connected to Anna went crazy. Her heart rate had plummeted. Anna was going into a coma, so they started injecting her with drugs to revive her. She seemed to be slipping away.

"For nearly an hour, medical staff tried different drugs," says Joanna. "Luckily she stabilised again and the alarms went quiet. Her colour improved and she started breathing more deeply.

"Then at 5am, Anna suddenly sat up and said, 'Where am I? I need the loo!' She's vowed not to get drunk again. She's learnt her lesson."

"I can't even stand the smell of alcohol now," says Anna.
title

Relationships can be hard, and often things don't work out quite as we think they should. We blame ourselves, get sad and start to wonder if we can do anything right. But sometimes we get confused, because people are different, expect different things and we don't know who's right.

So here are a few things to ponder.....

A healthy relationship is based on respect.

It's when:

* you have fun together
* you both feel like you can be yourself
* you can have different opinions and interests
* you listen to each other
* you trust each other
* you can both compromise, say sorry, and talk arguments out
* you don't have to spend all of you spare time together - you can spend time on your own, or with your own friends and family.

"I really love and trust my boyfriend, he's like one of my best friends and I can tell him anything. He just wants us to have fun together, there's no pressure, and he doesn't make a big deal of it if I don't want to do what he wants. I can be myself with him" - Ana.
Jealousy - is this love?

"I thought our relationship was fantastic at first. But now things have started happening that I don't understand. He gets mad a me for wanting to be with my friends. And any time he sees me speaking to any other guy he accuses me of flirting. He says it's because he loves me."

Jealousy might seem like a sign of love. But when someone uses anger or jealousy to try to control what you do, or acts like they 'own' you, this isn't love - it's control. You've got every right to talk to anyone you want to.

What about Sex, am I ready? ..Should I feel Ready?

Having a good relationship doesn't mean you have to have sex. But whatever you do, whether it's kissing, touching or having sex, it should always be something that you both want to do.



Sex is meant to be:

* something you decide to do when you're ready to
* something that makes you both feel good
* something you can interrupt or stop at any time
* safe (because you're both prepared with condoms to protect you from sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancy)

Sex isn't meant to be:

* the only way to prove that you love someone
* something you feel pressured or forced into
* something you do because 'everyone else is doing it'
* something that makes you feel used.

Remember, if you've been kissing or touching but don't want to go any further, that's ok. Kissing is not a contract.
Trust and communication

The most important thing in a sexual relationship is that you trust the other person and you feel like you can communicate with them.

If you are considering a sexual relationship, or if you are in a sexual relationship, ask yourself:

* How much do I trust this person to respect what I do and don't want to do?
* How comfortable would I feel talking with them about safe sex and contraception?
* How comfortable would I feel saying no to them?

Someone who loves you should respect your right to decide if and when to have sex.

If you don't feel ready to have sex, you could say "I really like you but I don't feel ready to have sex yet".
Sex and Pressure

"I kept on pushing his hands away but he just put them back there, then I just froze, I couldn't say anything, it was horrible".

What if someone has touched you or made you touch them in a sexual way, and you felt like you had no choice?

You might have

* felt scared to say no
* felt pressured into having sex, because they made you think that if you didn't, they'd break up with you, or they wouldn't like you
* been asleep or drunk and didn't really know what was going on
* been forced into sexual contact

No-one should force you into any type of sexual contact. In fact, this is sexual assault, and it is a crime that can be reported to the police.

Remember, they have done the wrong thing, not you. It can help to talk to someone about it.

CBS News: Health benefits of regular Sex?

Sex is not only a pleasurable thing but also has a wonderful health benefits. CBS News published a good article on the 10 health benefits of having regular intercourse. In modern stressful life, sex is a wonderful stress reliever.
10 health benefits of daily sex:

1. Decrease in blood pressure due to stress reduction.

2. Improvement in immunity due to release of antibodies.

3. It is a wonderful exercise.

4. It strengthens pelvic muscles.

5. Regular intercourse protects from heart diseases due to happy relations.

6. It improves one’s self confidence.

7. Daily intercourse improves relations between couple.

8. It reduces pain.

9. Sex reduces prostate cancer risk in men.

10. You can sleep better after good sex session.
Top 10 Reasons To Have Sex Tonight
(WebMD) When you're in the mood, it's a sure bet that the last thing on your mind is boosting your immune system or maintaining a healthy weight. Yet good sex offers those health benefits and more.

That's a surprise to many people, says Joy Davidson, PhD, a New York psychologist and sex therapist. "Of course, sex is everywhere in the media," she says. "But the idea that we are vital, sexual creatures is still looked at in some cases with disgust or in other cases a bit of embarrassment. So to really take a look at how our sexuality adds to our life and enhances our life and our health, both physical and psychological, is eye-opening for many people."

Sex does a body good in a number of ways, according to Davidson and other experts. The benefits aren't just anecdotal or hearsay -- each of these 10 health benefits of sex is backed by scientific scrutiny.

Among the benefits of healthy loving in a relationship:

1. Sex Relieves Stress

A big health benefit of sex is lower blood pressure and overall stress reduction, according to researchers from Scotland who reported their findings in the journal Biological Psychology. They studied 24 women and 22 men who kept records of their sexual activity. Then the researchers subjected them to stressful situations -- such as speaking in public and doing verbal arithmetic -- and noted their blood pressure response to stress.

Those who had intercourse had better responses to stress than those who engaged in other sexual behaviors or abstained.

Another study published in the same journal found that frequent intercourse was associated with lower diastolic blood pressure in cohabiting participants. Yet other research found a link between partner hugs and lower blood pressure in women.

2. Sex Boosts Immunity

Good sexual health may mean better physical health. Having sex once or twice a week has been linked with higher levels of an antibody called immunoglobulin A or IgA, which can protect you from getting colds and other infections. Scientists at Wilkes University in Wilkes-Barre, Pa., took samples of saliva, which contain IgA, from 112 college students who reported the frequency of sex they had.

Those in the "frequent" group -- once or twice a week -- had higher
levels of IgA than those in the other three groups -- who reported being abstinent, having sex less than once a week, or having it very often, three or more times weekly.

3. Sex Burns Calories

Thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. It may not sound like much, but it adds up: 42 half-hour sessions will burn 3,570 calories, more than enough to lose a pound. Doubling up, you could drop that pound in 21 hour-long sessions.

"Sex is a great mode of exercise," says Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles sexologist and president of the American Association of Sexuality Educators and Therapists. It takes work, from both a physical and psychological perspective, to do it well, she says.

4. Sex Improves Cardiovascular Health

While some older folks may worry that the efforts expended during sex could cause a stroke, that's not so, according to researchers from
England. In a study published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, scientists found frequency of sex was not associated with stroke in the 914 men they followed for 20 years.

And the heart health benefits of sex don't end there. The researchers also found that having sex twice or more a week reduced the risk of fatal heart attack by half for the men, compared with those who had sex less than once a month.

5. Sex Boosts Self-Esteem

Boosting self-esteem was one of 237 reasons people have sex, collected by University of Texas researchers and published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

That finding makes sense to Gina Ogden, PhD, a sex therapist and marriage and family therapist in Cambridge, Mass., although she finds that those who already have self-esteem say they sometimes have sex to feel even better. "One of the reasons people say they have sex is to feel good about themselves," she tells WebMD. "Great sex begins with self-esteem, and it raises it. If the sex is loving, connected, and what you want, it raises it."

6. Sex Improves Intimacy

Having sex and orgasms increases levels of the hormone oxytocin, the
so-called love hormone, which helps us bond and build trust. Researchers from
the University of Pittsburgh and the University of North Carolina evaluated 59
premenopausal women before and after warm contact with their husbands and partners ending with hugs. Tey found that the more contact, the higher the oxytocin levels.

"Oxytocin allows us to feel the urge to nurture and to bond," Britton says.

Higher oxytocin has also been linked with a feeling of generosity. So if you're feeling suddenly more generous toward your partner than usual, credit the love hormone.

7. Sex Reduces Pain

As the hormone oxytocin surges, endorphins increase, and pain
declines. So if your headache, arthritis pain, or PMS symptoms seem to improve after sex, you can thank those higher oxytocin levels.

In a study published in the Bulletin of Experimental Biology and
Medicine, 48 volunteers who inhaled oxytocin vapor and then had their fingers pricked lowered their pain threshold by more than half.

8. Sex Reduces Prostate Cancer Risk

Frequent ejaculations, especially in 20-something men, may reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life, Australian researchers reported in the British Journal of Urology International. When they followed men diagnosed with prostate cancer and those without, they found no association of prostate cancer with the number of sexual partners as the men reached their 30s, 40s, and 50s.

But they found men who had five or more ejaculations weekly while in their 20s reduced their risk of getting prostate cancer later by a third.

Another study, reported in the Journal of the American Medical
Association, found that frequent ejaculations, 21 or more a month, were linked to lower prostate cancer risk in older men, as well, compared with less frequent ejaculations of four to seven monthly.

9. Sex Strengthens Pelvic Floor Muscles

For women, doing a few pelvic floor muscle exercises known as Kegels during sex offers a couple of benefits. You will enjoy more pleasure, and you'll also strengthen the area and help to minimize the risk of incontinence later in life.

To do a basic Kegel exercise, tighten the muscles of your pelvic floor, as if you're trying to stop the flow of urine. Count to three, then release.

10. Sex Helps You Sleep Better

The oxytocin released during orgasm also promotes sleep, according to research.

And getting enough sleep has been linked with a host of other good things, such as maintaining a healthy weight and blood pressure. Something to think about, especially if you've been wondering why your guy can be active one minute and snoring the next.

CBS News: Health benefits of regular Sex?

Sex is not only a pleasurable thing but also has a wonderful health benefits. CBS News published a good article on the 10 health benefits of having regular intercourse. In modern stressful life, sex is a wonderful stress reliever.
10 health benefits of daily sex:

1. Decrease in blood pressure due to stress reduction.

2. Improvement in immunity due to release of antibodies.

3. It is a wonderful exercise.

4. It strengthens pelvic muscles.

5. Regular intercourse protects from heart diseases due to happy relations.

6. It improves one’s self confidence.

7. Daily intercourse improves relations between couple.

8. It reduces pain.

9. Sex reduces prostate cancer risk in men.

10. You can sleep better after good sex session.
Top 10 Reasons To Have Sex Tonight
(WebMD) When you're in the mood, it's a sure bet that the last thing on your mind is boosting your immune system or maintaining a healthy weight. Yet good sex offers those health benefits and more.

That's a surprise to many people, says Joy Davidson, PhD, a New York psychologist and sex therapist. "Of course, sex is everywhere in the media," she says. "But the idea that we are vital, sexual creatures is still looked at in some cases with disgust or in other cases a bit of embarrassment. So to really take a look at how our sexuality adds to our life and enhances our life and our health, both physical and psychological, is eye-opening for many people."

Sex does a body good in a number of ways, according to Davidson and other experts. The benefits aren't just anecdotal or hearsay -- each of these 10 health benefits of sex is backed by scientific scrutiny.

Among the benefits of healthy loving in a relationship:

1. Sex Relieves Stress

A big health benefit of sex is lower blood pressure and overall stress reduction, according to researchers from Scotland who reported their findings in the journal Biological Psychology. They studied 24 women and 22 men who kept records of their sexual activity. Then the researchers subjected them to stressful situations -- such as speaking in public and doing verbal arithmetic -- and noted their blood pressure response to stress.

Those who had intercourse had better responses to stress than those who engaged in other sexual behaviors or abstained.

Another study published in the same journal found that frequent intercourse was associated with lower diastolic blood pressure in cohabiting participants. Yet other research found a link between partner hugs and lower blood pressure in women.

2. Sex Boosts Immunity

Good sexual health may mean better physical health. Having sex once or twice a week has been linked with higher levels of an antibody called immunoglobulin A or IgA, which can protect you from getting colds and other infections. Scientists at Wilkes University in Wilkes-Barre, Pa., took samples of saliva, which contain IgA, from 112 college students who reported the frequency of sex they had.

Those in the "frequent" group -- once or twice a week -- had higher
levels of IgA than those in the other three groups -- who reported being abstinent, having sex less than once a week, or having it very often, three or more times weekly.

3. Sex Burns Calories

Thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. It may not sound like much, but it adds up: 42 half-hour sessions will burn 3,570 calories, more than enough to lose a pound. Doubling up, you could drop that pound in 21 hour-long sessions.

"Sex is a great mode of exercise," says Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles sexologist and president of the American Association of Sexuality Educators and Therapists. It takes work, from both a physical and psychological perspective, to do it well, she says.

4. Sex Improves Cardiovascular Health

While some older folks may worry that the efforts expended during sex could cause a stroke, that's not so, according to researchers from
England. In a study published in the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, scientists found frequency of sex was not associated with stroke in the 914 men they followed for 20 years.

And the heart health benefits of sex don't end there. The researchers also found that having sex twice or more a week reduced the risk of fatal heart attack by half for the men, compared with those who had sex less than once a month.

5. Sex Boosts Self-Esteem

Boosting self-esteem was one of 237 reasons people have sex, collected by University of Texas researchers and published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior.

That finding makes sense to Gina Ogden, PhD, a sex therapist and marriage and family therapist in Cambridge, Mass., although she finds that those who already have self-esteem say they sometimes have sex to feel even better. "One of the reasons people say they have sex is to feel good about themselves," she tells WebMD. "Great sex begins with self-esteem, and it raises it. If the sex is loving, connected, and what you want, it raises it."

6. Sex Improves Intimacy

Having sex and orgasms increases levels of the hormone oxytocin, the
so-called love hormone, which helps us bond and build trust. Researchers from
the University of Pittsburgh and the University of North Carolina evaluated 59
premenopausal women before and after warm contact with their husbands and partners ending with hugs. Tey found that the more contact, the higher the oxytocin levels.

"Oxytocin allows us to feel the urge to nurture and to bond," Britton says.

Higher oxytocin has also been linked with a feeling of generosity. So if you're feeling suddenly more generous toward your partner than usual, credit the love hormone.

7. Sex Reduces Pain

As the hormone oxytocin surges, endorphins increase, and pain
declines. So if your headache, arthritis pain, or PMS symptoms seem to improve after sex, you can thank those higher oxytocin levels.

In a study published in the Bulletin of Experimental Biology and
Medicine, 48 volunteers who inhaled oxytocin vapor and then had their fingers pricked lowered their pain threshold by more than half.

8. Sex Reduces Prostate Cancer Risk

Frequent ejaculations, especially in 20-something men, may reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life, Australian researchers reported in the British Journal of Urology International. When they followed men diagnosed with prostate cancer and those without, they found no association of prostate cancer with the number of sexual partners as the men reached their 30s, 40s, and 50s.

But they found men who had five or more ejaculations weekly while in their 20s reduced their risk of getting prostate cancer later by a third.

Another study, reported in the Journal of the American Medical
Association, found that frequent ejaculations, 21 or more a month, were linked to lower prostate cancer risk in older men, as well, compared with less frequent ejaculations of four to seven monthly.

9. Sex Strengthens Pelvic Floor Muscles

For women, doing a few pelvic floor muscle exercises known as Kegels during sex offers a couple of benefits. You will enjoy more pleasure, and you'll also strengthen the area and help to minimize the risk of incontinence later in life.

To do a basic Kegel exercise, tighten the muscles of your pelvic floor, as if you're trying to stop the flow of urine. Count to three, then release.

10. Sex Helps You Sleep Better

The oxytocin released during orgasm also promotes sleep, according to research.

And getting enough sleep has been linked with a host of other good things, such as maintaining a healthy weight and blood pressure. Something to think about, especially if you've been wondering why your guy can be active one minute and snoring the next.

Wall Standing Sex Position

The basic wall standing sex position

This position refers to penetration with both partners standing, and one partner using a wall to support themselves while being penetrated by their partner. Face the wall, bending a bit at the waist, and depending on comfort and height, bending your knees. You may have just their hands, or possibly your forearms pressing against the wall (in a sort of stereotypical "frisking" pose from TV cop shows). Your partner is behind you facing the wall as well, penetration is from behind.

Pros of the Wall Standing Sex Position

* As with all standing sex positions, this one can be great for quickie sex.
* You can use the wall for support and push off it, allowing the partner against the wall more strength to guide the penetration.
* Lots of fantasy role play potential with this position.
* If you have strong leg muscles you can vary the angle and strength of penetration without extra strain on your hips.

Cons of the Wall Standing Sex Position

* Requires significant leg muscle strength for the basic position
* Requires flexibility
* Most of the physical contact is with the upper body, and when you are facing away from each other, the partner facing the wall doesn't get to touch very much.
* Some people find this position tiring and won't use it for an entire session, or won't orgasm in this position.

Wall Standing Sex Position

The basic wall standing sex position

This position refers to penetration with both partners standing, and one partner using a wall to support themselves while being penetrated by their partner. Face the wall, bending a bit at the waist, and depending on comfort and height, bending your knees. You may have just their hands, or possibly your forearms pressing against the wall (in a sort of stereotypical "frisking" pose from TV cop shows). Your partner is behind you facing the wall as well, penetration is from behind.

Pros of the Wall Standing Sex Position

* As with all standing sex positions, this one can be great for quickie sex.
* You can use the wall for support and push off it, allowing the partner against the wall more strength to guide the penetration.
* Lots of fantasy role play potential with this position.
* If you have strong leg muscles you can vary the angle and strength of penetration without extra strain on your hips.

Cons of the Wall Standing Sex Position

* Requires significant leg muscle strength for the basic position
* Requires flexibility
* Most of the physical contact is with the upper body, and when you are facing away from each other, the partner facing the wall doesn't get to touch very much.
* Some people find this position tiring and won't use it for an entire session, or won't orgasm in this position.

Bum Lift Sex Position

The basic bum lift sex position.
This position is a variation of missionary sex positions and knees on chest sex positions. In this position the partner being penetrated lies flat on their back with their legs spread open. The penetrating partner kneels in front of their partner and puts one or both hands under their partners bum, lifting them up and tilting their pelvis forward while penetrating them. The partner being penetrated can rest their legs at the ankle on their partner's shoulders.Download Link Here

Pros of the Bum Lift Sex Position

* This position allows for easy change of variation in penetration angle and depth.
* There can be a lot of pressing of flesh, and physical closeness with this sex position.
* This position is face to face.
* This position allows the penetrating partner to use their hands and upper body to add motion to the penetration.

Cons of the Bum Lift Sex Position

* The partner on the bottom has less control, most of the movement comes from one partner.[li]This position requires good flexibility in the legs for the partner being penetrated, and good balance and strength for the partner doing the penetration.
* This position would not be comfortable if done on a hard surface (rough carpet, a table, the floor, etc…)

Bum Lift Sex Position

The basic bum lift sex position.
This position is a variation of missionary sex positions and knees on chest sex positions. In this position the partner being penetrated lies flat on their back with their legs spread open. The penetrating partner kneels in front of their partner and puts one or both hands under their partners bum, lifting them up and tilting their pelvis forward while penetrating them. The partner being penetrated can rest their legs at the ankle on their partner's shoulders.Download Link Here

Pros of the Bum Lift Sex Position

* This position allows for easy change of variation in penetration angle and depth.
* There can be a lot of pressing of flesh, and physical closeness with this sex position.
* This position is face to face.
* This position allows the penetrating partner to use their hands and upper body to add motion to the penetration.

Cons of the Bum Lift Sex Position

* The partner on the bottom has less control, most of the movement comes from one partner.[li]This position requires good flexibility in the legs for the partner being penetrated, and good balance and strength for the partner doing the penetration.
* This position would not be comfortable if done on a hard surface (rough carpet, a table, the floor, etc…)

Study: Having Sex is good for health

Sex seems to be more than a hormonal discharge and some short moments of pure pleasure. Scientists show that sex is extremely beneficial for our health, while the lack of an active sex life might have negative effects. But too much sex, can also be harmful: more than thrice a week it can weaken the immune system, making us vulnerable to infections.

Scientific research is starting to show that regular sex appears to help to stave off the threat of illness - and what’s more, it could even help people to live longer.

Following are few important points which shows how sex can help keeping up good health.

1. Our mental and emotional health balance is clearly influenced by sex. Abstinence is known to cause from anxiety to paranoia and depression… In fact, in case of light depressions, after having sex the brain releases endorphins, that decrease stress, inducing a state of euphoria.

2. Sex can be a beauty treatment. While having sex, a woman’s body doubles the estrogen level, and this makes her hair shine and the skin becomes softer.

3. A 10-year research carried on 1,000 middle-aged men at Queens University in Belfast, Ireland, showed that sex on a regular basis increases the humans’ lifespan. For the same age and health, those who had orgasms more frequently had half the death rate of men who did not have such frequent orgasms. This could be due to the plummeting stress hormones, reaction that installs after we have sex.

3. Sweating while having sex cleanse the skin pores, making the skin brighter and decreasing the risk of developing dermatitis.

4. Sex can make us lose weight. You burn all that fat and carbohydrates from the romantic dinner. Quickies of 20 minutes weekly mean 7 500 calories annually, that’s as much as you consume on 120 km (745 mi) of jogging. A sex session can burn about 200 calories. This is like running 15 minutes on a treadmill!

5. Sex strengthen our muscles. You can imagine the effort made by your muscles through those pushes and flexions. It depends on your stunts in bed, of course. And it’s clearly a lot more fun than running for miles.

6. The more active your sex life is, the more attractive for the opposite sex you are. High sexual activity makes the body release more pheromones, chemicals that attract the opposite sex.

7. Sex sharpens our senses, at least the smell. Following the orgasm, a rise of the hormone prolactin makes the brain’s stem cells form new neurons in the olfactory bulb, boosting a person’s olfactory abilities.

8. Sex is also a pain reliever, ten times more effective than Valium: immediately before orgasm, levels of the hormone oxytocin rise by five times, determining a huge release of endorphins. These chemicals calm pain, from a minor headache to arthritis or migraines, and with no secondary effects. Migraines also disappear because the pressure in the brain’s blood vessels is lowered while we have sex. So now we see that actually, a woman’s headache is rather a good reason for having sex, not against it.

9. Kissing your partner daily means less visits to dentist. Kissing stimulates salivation, which cleanses food left between the teeth and lowers the acidity in the mouth, the main cause of the tooth decay.

10. A good sex session can be a good remedy against stiff nose, being a natural antihistaminic that helps combating asthma and high fever.

11. Having sex regularly drops the cholesterol level, balancing the ratio good cholesterol: bad cholesterol.

12. The hormones released while we have sex helps both men and women; estrogen protects a woman’s heart but on the long term, it can be efficient also against Alzheimer’s disease and osteoporosis while testosterone strengthens the bones and muscles.

13. Sex is not beneficial not only for the heart, but also for the blood circulation, especially in the brain, because of the increased heart rate and deep breathing.

14. The sexual activity lowers the risk of getting colds and the flu. 1-2 intercourses weekly means 30 % higher levels of the antibody immunoglobulin A, that spurs the immune system.

15. Sex leads to a better control of the bladder, by strengthening the pelvis muscles controlling the flow of urine.

16. After orgasm, especially in the evening, we become sleepy. This is the effect of some good sex: it increases sleep quality. Following an orgasm, the body of both males or females becomes completely relaxed, so they may have a good deep sleep.

17. Sex fights cancer! Various researches have shown that a high ejaculation frequency and sexual activity are linked to a lower risk of prostate cancer later in life. A study found out that men who ejaculated 13 to 20 times monthly presented a 14% lower risk of prostate cancer than men who ejaculated on average, between 4 and 7 times monthly for most of their adult life. Those ejaculating over 21 times a month presented a 33% decreased risk of developing prostate cancer than the baseline group.

Study: Having Sex is good for health

Sex seems to be more than a hormonal discharge and some short moments of pure pleasure. Scientists show that sex is extremely beneficial for our health, while the lack of an active sex life might have negative effects. But too much sex, can also be harmful: more than thrice a week it can weaken the immune system, making us vulnerable to infections.

Scientific research is starting to show that regular sex appears to help to stave off the threat of illness - and what’s more, it could even help people to live longer.

Following are few important points which shows how sex can help keeping up good health.

1. Our mental and emotional health balance is clearly influenced by sex. Abstinence is known to cause from anxiety to paranoia and depression… In fact, in case of light depressions, after having sex the brain releases endorphins, that decrease stress, inducing a state of euphoria.

2. Sex can be a beauty treatment. While having sex, a woman’s body doubles the estrogen level, and this makes her hair shine and the skin becomes softer.

3. A 10-year research carried on 1,000 middle-aged men at Queens University in Belfast, Ireland, showed that sex on a regular basis increases the humans’ lifespan. For the same age and health, those who had orgasms more frequently had half the death rate of men who did not have such frequent orgasms. This could be due to the plummeting stress hormones, reaction that installs after we have sex.

3. Sweating while having sex cleanse the skin pores, making the skin brighter and decreasing the risk of developing dermatitis.

4. Sex can make us lose weight. You burn all that fat and carbohydrates from the romantic dinner. Quickies of 20 minutes weekly mean 7 500 calories annually, that’s as much as you consume on 120 km (745 mi) of jogging. A sex session can burn about 200 calories. This is like running 15 minutes on a treadmill!

5. Sex strengthen our muscles. You can imagine the effort made by your muscles through those pushes and flexions. It depends on your stunts in bed, of course. And it’s clearly a lot more fun than running for miles.

6. The more active your sex life is, the more attractive for the opposite sex you are. High sexual activity makes the body release more pheromones, chemicals that attract the opposite sex.

7. Sex sharpens our senses, at least the smell. Following the orgasm, a rise of the hormone prolactin makes the brain’s stem cells form new neurons in the olfactory bulb, boosting a person’s olfactory abilities.

8. Sex is also a pain reliever, ten times more effective than Valium: immediately before orgasm, levels of the hormone oxytocin rise by five times, determining a huge release of endorphins. These chemicals calm pain, from a minor headache to arthritis or migraines, and with no secondary effects. Migraines also disappear because the pressure in the brain’s blood vessels is lowered while we have sex. So now we see that actually, a woman’s headache is rather a good reason for having sex, not against it.

9. Kissing your partner daily means less visits to dentist. Kissing stimulates salivation, which cleanses food left between the teeth and lowers the acidity in the mouth, the main cause of the tooth decay.

10. A good sex session can be a good remedy against stiff nose, being a natural antihistaminic that helps combating asthma and high fever.

11. Having sex regularly drops the cholesterol level, balancing the ratio good cholesterol: bad cholesterol.

12. The hormones released while we have sex helps both men and women; estrogen protects a woman’s heart but on the long term, it can be efficient also against Alzheimer’s disease and osteoporosis while testosterone strengthens the bones and muscles.

13. Sex is not beneficial not only for the heart, but also for the blood circulation, especially in the brain, because of the increased heart rate and deep breathing.

14. The sexual activity lowers the risk of getting colds and the flu. 1-2 intercourses weekly means 30 % higher levels of the antibody immunoglobulin A, that spurs the immune system.

15. Sex leads to a better control of the bladder, by strengthening the pelvis muscles controlling the flow of urine.

16. After orgasm, especially in the evening, we become sleepy. This is the effect of some good sex: it increases sleep quality. Following an orgasm, the body of both males or females becomes completely relaxed, so they may have a good deep sleep.

17. Sex fights cancer! Various researches have shown that a high ejaculation frequency and sexual activity are linked to a lower risk of prostate cancer later in life. A study found out that men who ejaculated 13 to 20 times monthly presented a 14% lower risk of prostate cancer than men who ejaculated on average, between 4 and 7 times monthly for most of their adult life. Those ejaculating over 21 times a month presented a 33% decreased risk of developing prostate cancer than the baseline group.

Love is good for the health and morale

Except against indication of the doctor, sexual relations are beneficial. The oxygen requirements are equivalent to those required for gardening or walking 20 minutes!

Serious studies show that if sexuality is an undeniable dimension of the human person, it is also a health factor at all. The explanations of Dr. Sylvain Mimoun.

Muscler his heart
The sexual act, reduced to its dimension “physical” provides, among other things, eliminate toxins, activate the movement and the heart muscle. This is a first good argument to convince a (e) reluctant partner (e)!
After a heart attack or a double bypass, a couple may fear to engage in sexual relations. Quite the contrary, say cardiologists, who préconiseront a man with a fragile heart to resume gradually its ébats. On average, the heart beats between 70 and 80 beats per minute. During a sexual relationship, the heart rate to 100 beats during the excitement, and even 180 at the time of orgasm. “Studies have shown a reduction in cardiovascular risk. It is estimated that a person with a heart in good shape should have a report about thirty minutes, three times a week “, calls Dr Mimoun.
Other lesser-known benefit: making love would also be excellent to prevent prostate cancer. A 2004 study (published in the Journal of the American Medical Association) showed a decrease of 15% of the risk of developing cancer. Better! In 2006, another study by Prof. Giles (British Journal of Urology) concludes that the reduction in risk of this cancer by 30% from five reports per week (including masturbation), compared to a man with less than two weekly reports .
The explanation is physiological. Thanks to ejaculation, the prostate is “décongestionnée” regularly and eliminates toxins, which limits the inflammatory phenomena. “Prudence, however, these studies are few, warns Dr Mimoun. We should not be a standard bearer of hypersexuality or masturbation! ”
The women, they would be protected from breast cancer through their oxytocin, known as “hormone attachment.” Sécrétée during breastfeeding the baby, it also would release during the stimulation of their nipples by the partner. It knows that at the moment of orgasm, it is present in large quantities. The female hormone not only creates the link between the mother and her baby, and also between the woman and her sexual partner.
A harmonious sexual intercourse accompanied by a well-being, a sense of euphoria. And if you sleep so well after, scientists say, it is thanks to the endorphins that allow relaxation and are quickly becoming men into the arms of Morpheus, while the benefits of orgasm are more durable in the woman. This effect antistress of love would it not finally felt the same way by men and women? According to Dr Mimoun, “especially men are aware of the extremely relaxing of love.” At stress level equal (concerns, concerns of all kinds), “men make love to relax, women need to be relaxed to make love.” Anyway, this relaxation is beneficial for physical and mental health.

Play the betrothed
In 1975, WHO (World Health Organization) has defined very seriously the notion of “sexual health”, giving as the main function of personality development. “Complicity sexual talks,” said Dr Francoise Court, sorry to those situations where men find themselves face to face with a woman they have neglected for years, couples who have neither the language nor gestures or physical familiarity for love. She noted in his consultations: “Senior citizens do not speak enough of them, their feelings.” Dr. Marie-Measson Chevret adds: “They should listen more. A man is not a woman, a woman or a man. Everyone could understand how the other for his pleasure to go and play with it. ”
In a couple, the behaviour of each ideal is to stay as often as possible “in love”. Sexuality or not, senior citizens “must rediscover the pleasure to give pleasure each other,” says Dr M. Lachowsky who call it the beautiful name “play the betrothed.” This is to get out of the routine, talk, leave home for exchange, do things together.

Creating an atmosphere of intimacy
Concretely, it means “to have more demonstrations of affection,” says Dr. Antoine Lemaire. This will create a climate conducive to the relaxation reports lovers. For in love, especially after 60 years, nothing can occur in stress and under pressure. A man as a woman can have a very strong desire, while the physical is not necessarily so. “The most profitable is to get the rhythm of the body of his partner,” advises Dr. Marie-Hélène Colson. “If the excitement is slower to come for reasons
physiological (lubrication or orgasm slowest for Women, erection more fragile to humans), it going to take his time, try other gestures… enjoy the moment. And find out blow. ”
From tenderness, sensuality. And all sexologists say: rediscover, as adolescents, happiness in the preliminaries. With a little extra acquired through experience: men must learn to be more receptive and women less in anticipation of pleasure.

And the desire of women, how to revive?
Whether related to menopause and / or age, female desire disorders are common, although some women escape.
What gynecologists now offer women who have a libido-mast then they would have wanted “to ensure”? The responses of Dr. Michele Lachowsky.

* First, listen: there is no question beast. Understanding where comes the pain for the report, lack of arousal, lack of desire or orgasm that does not come. Sexuality is not isolated from history in love and married the woman. Maybe his family problems.

* Second, we can now all be addressed, if women really want. The simplest, local treatments against drought

vaginally. More generally, a hormone-based estrogen, controlled in time, which will affect the quality of sex: it helps lubrication and excitement by acting on congestion in the vagina and vulva, therefore, indirectly, on pleasure.

* But if the desire is really not the rendezvous, as in half of women who have had a “surgical menopause”, they are prescribed more recently, in addition to the treatment “classical”, a testosterone patch to the (treatment based androgens). In the very near future, it may propose to all women suffer from a lack of libido. A patient to whom I had prescribed said: “I was more myself, I do feel more capable of anything. With this treatment, I found not only the desire for my husband, but also my zest for life. “

Love is good for the health and morale

Except against indication of the doctor, sexual relations are beneficial. The oxygen requirements are equivalent to those required for gardening or walking 20 minutes!

Serious studies show that if sexuality is an undeniable dimension of the human person, it is also a health factor at all. The explanations of Dr. Sylvain Mimoun.

Muscler his heart
The sexual act, reduced to its dimension “physical” provides, among other things, eliminate toxins, activate the movement and the heart muscle. This is a first good argument to convince a (e) reluctant partner (e)!
After a heart attack or a double bypass, a couple may fear to engage in sexual relations. Quite the contrary, say cardiologists, who préconiseront a man with a fragile heart to resume gradually its ébats. On average, the heart beats between 70 and 80 beats per minute. During a sexual relationship, the heart rate to 100 beats during the excitement, and even 180 at the time of orgasm. “Studies have shown a reduction in cardiovascular risk. It is estimated that a person with a heart in good shape should have a report about thirty minutes, three times a week “, calls Dr Mimoun.
Other lesser-known benefit: making love would also be excellent to prevent prostate cancer. A 2004 study (published in the Journal of the American Medical Association) showed a decrease of 15% of the risk of developing cancer. Better! In 2006, another study by Prof. Giles (British Journal of Urology) concludes that the reduction in risk of this cancer by 30% from five reports per week (including masturbation), compared to a man with less than two weekly reports .
The explanation is physiological. Thanks to ejaculation, the prostate is “décongestionnée” regularly and eliminates toxins, which limits the inflammatory phenomena. “Prudence, however, these studies are few, warns Dr Mimoun. We should not be a standard bearer of hypersexuality or masturbation! ”
The women, they would be protected from breast cancer through their oxytocin, known as “hormone attachment.” Sécrétée during breastfeeding the baby, it also would release during the stimulation of their nipples by the partner. It knows that at the moment of orgasm, it is present in large quantities. The female hormone not only creates the link between the mother and her baby, and also between the woman and her sexual partner.
A harmonious sexual intercourse accompanied by a well-being, a sense of euphoria. And if you sleep so well after, scientists say, it is thanks to the endorphins that allow relaxation and are quickly becoming men into the arms of Morpheus, while the benefits of orgasm are more durable in the woman. This effect antistress of love would it not finally felt the same way by men and women? According to Dr Mimoun, “especially men are aware of the extremely relaxing of love.” At stress level equal (concerns, concerns of all kinds), “men make love to relax, women need to be relaxed to make love.” Anyway, this relaxation is beneficial for physical and mental health.

Play the betrothed
In 1975, WHO (World Health Organization) has defined very seriously the notion of “sexual health”, giving as the main function of personality development. “Complicity sexual talks,” said Dr Francoise Court, sorry to those situations where men find themselves face to face with a woman they have neglected for years, couples who have neither the language nor gestures or physical familiarity for love. She noted in his consultations: “Senior citizens do not speak enough of them, their feelings.” Dr. Marie-Measson Chevret adds: “They should listen more. A man is not a woman, a woman or a man. Everyone could understand how the other for his pleasure to go and play with it. ”
In a couple, the behaviour of each ideal is to stay as often as possible “in love”. Sexuality or not, senior citizens “must rediscover the pleasure to give pleasure each other,” says Dr M. Lachowsky who call it the beautiful name “play the betrothed.” This is to get out of the routine, talk, leave home for exchange, do things together.

Creating an atmosphere of intimacy
Concretely, it means “to have more demonstrations of affection,” says Dr. Antoine Lemaire. This will create a climate conducive to the relaxation reports lovers. For in love, especially after 60 years, nothing can occur in stress and under pressure. A man as a woman can have a very strong desire, while the physical is not necessarily so. “The most profitable is to get the rhythm of the body of his partner,” advises Dr. Marie-Hélène Colson. “If the excitement is slower to come for reasons
physiological (lubrication or orgasm slowest for Women, erection more fragile to humans), it going to take his time, try other gestures… enjoy the moment. And find out blow. ”
From tenderness, sensuality. And all sexologists say: rediscover, as adolescents, happiness in the preliminaries. With a little extra acquired through experience: men must learn to be more receptive and women less in anticipation of pleasure.

And the desire of women, how to revive?
Whether related to menopause and / or age, female desire disorders are common, although some women escape.
What gynecologists now offer women who have a libido-mast then they would have wanted “to ensure”? The responses of Dr. Michele Lachowsky.

* First, listen: there is no question beast. Understanding where comes the pain for the report, lack of arousal, lack of desire or orgasm that does not come. Sexuality is not isolated from history in love and married the woman. Maybe his family problems.

* Second, we can now all be addressed, if women really want. The simplest, local treatments against drought

vaginally. More generally, a hormone-based estrogen, controlled in time, which will affect the quality of sex: it helps lubrication and excitement by acting on congestion in the vagina and vulva, therefore, indirectly, on pleasure.

* But if the desire is really not the rendezvous, as in half of women who have had a “surgical menopause”, they are prescribed more recently, in addition to the treatment “classical”, a testosterone patch to the (treatment based androgens). In the very near future, it may propose to all women suffer from a lack of libido. A patient to whom I had prescribed said: “I was more myself, I do feel more capable of anything. With this treatment, I found not only the desire for my husband, but also my zest for life. “

Sex Study States Best Sexual Experience Lasts Just Minutes

April 2, 2008

Boston (dbTechno) - According to a new survey carried out by researchers in the U.S., the best sex lasts between 7 and 13 minutes. This goes against the long male belief that with sex, the longer you last, the better it is.

The research was led by Dr. Eric Corty of the Behrend College in Pennsylvania.

The study took a closer look at what the best length of time is for the optimal sexual experience for both partners.

The survey was done with a random sample of Americans and Canadians.

It found that sex which lasts 7 to 13 minutes was best. Sex lasting anywhere from 3 to 7 minutes was listed as “adequate.”

Those surveyed stated that sex lasting anything under 3 minutes was too short. Likewise, anything lasting longer than 13 minutes was too long.

The study is published in the International Journal of Sexual Medicine.

Sex Study States Best Sexual Experience Lasts Just Minutes

April 2, 2008

Boston (dbTechno) - According to a new survey carried out by researchers in the U.S., the best sex lasts between 7 and 13 minutes. This goes against the long male belief that with sex, the longer you last, the better it is.

The research was led by Dr. Eric Corty of the Behrend College in Pennsylvania.

The study took a closer look at what the best length of time is for the optimal sexual experience for both partners.

The survey was done with a random sample of Americans and Canadians.

It found that sex which lasts 7 to 13 minutes was best. Sex lasting anywhere from 3 to 7 minutes was listed as “adequate.”

Those surveyed stated that sex lasting anything under 3 minutes was too short. Likewise, anything lasting longer than 13 minutes was too long.

The study is published in the International Journal of Sexual Medicine.